Hi, Dave. I'm glad your partner did okay with his bypass surgery. Having been a RN for almost 25 years, I know how hazardous that can be, and yet must be done. He sounds like a prince, and I'm sure he feels equally blessed to have you. If he did not, he would not be the supportive man that he is! FiFi sends a "bark" to all of you. (I raised her to be a good little "Southern Belle" and to know her manners!) She appreciates the compliment, she wants you to know. ;) (Ain't it grand, "interpreting" for them!) As I told you, my CD 4 is over 1000, and my VL is non-detectable. Both Combivir/Sustiva, and Truvada/Sustiva (which later became Atripla, per my request), worked just as well, for me. I had the liver issue, which no one could find an official cause for, of course. CT scans merely showed how (painfully) enlarged it was. No tumors. Liver enzymes were negative. No one had any explanation. To this day, I believe it was the AZT in the Combivir, since it went away in 2 weeks after I temporarily stopped medications. You might, or might not know, that there are actually two theories about treating HIV. No, I am not talking about the "denialists" who deny that HIV causes AIDS. I am talking about medical theories. One theory, the older one, is the hold off on starting medications until you MUST take them, when your CD 4 is low, because of the side effects of the medications. The newer theory is to hit it hard, fast, and soon, immediately, when diagnosed, to delay or prevent going into full blown AIDS. BTW, all recent studies show starting medications immediately drastically improves one's quality of life, and the "reasons" for "waiting," as it were, until one "had" to take the medications, are less and less nowadays, as the newere medications are far less harsh than the oldest ones. At first, I chose the medications. After the liver issue, I refused, and wanted to do the "wait & see" thing (the old theory). Then my lungs went on permanent vacation (Idiopathic Lung Disease/Lyphocytic Interstitial Pneumonitis) at about 50% capacity, and my lung doc said that I no longer could take that risk, that one round of PCP would kill me, and I needed to restart my HIV medications immediately. Which I did, but I refused Combivir. Thus Truvada/Sustiva came into my life. Atripla is merely the combination of Truvada and Sustiva into ONE pill. Thus, I asked for that. At the time, I was still employed, on standard insurance, and that cut my cost in half, as I had to pay $40 for Truvada, and $40 for Sustiva, and I could pay just $40 only for Atripla, and get the same drugs in my system! That explains that. Later on, quite to our (mine, & all of my doctors) surprise, I had a "silent" heart attack, and developed some Congestive Heart Failure. (We found the heart attack quite by accident, with an echocardiogram! It was already an "old" one, officially, and I was already "healed" from it! Never knew it hit me!) Thus, my medications were rejigged again, for that, and I went into Pulmonary Rehabilitation Therapy exercises, where I got some strength back. (Which I lost after the heart attack, actually.) Before those 8 weeks, I could not walk through the grocery store. I would gasp for breath even with my oxygen on, and have to ride the electric cart to avoid that. Now, I can walk through the entire grocery store. Mind you, not all that fast, but I do get there. Plus, I put my "portable" (?) oxygen tank in the toddler seat of the grocery cart, and take that load off of me, too. I still find driving 120 miles round trip to my HIV doc, 90 miles round trip to my lung doc, or 60 miles round trip for my primary doc, rather tiring, and once I'm home, I'm pretty much ready for a long nap with FiFi. Well, that's enough from here. I will say this: you are entirely right, Dave. People who do not walk in our shoes cannot understand. Not at all. I learned a long time ago not to expect them to, at all. Probably the most offensive to me was something a so-called "HIV specialist" (Immunologist) said to me. I was still working, CD 4 over 1000, non-detectable VL, and I had gotten sick, again, with non-PCP pneumonia. It was my FIFTH time in one and one-half year! I was crying, in tears, when he made rounds, and said that I did not understand, that everyone said I had "full" immunity, and why was I getting so sick so often. He literally turned his nose up, with this haughty arrogant look about his face, and said, "We look upon this like any other long term chronic disease, these days, like diabetes." Well that really pissed me off, especially because I also have diabetes, and I could damn well tell him that having diabetes was nothing like having HIV. Imagine that, an officially billed as an "HIV specialist" because he was an "Immunologist" doc, talking like that, and that being his only answer to my emotional distress. I might add, from then on, for several months, he and I were terse with each other, when around each other, "professionally" - he realized he'd pissed me off, and he got belligerent. So, do I understand? Totally. More later, someday, sometime, I am sure, for both of us. Later, FiFi & Me - Just The Two Of Us. _______________________________________________________

Received April 15, 2009:

Hi Dave, I come from Malaysia, and has been in Singapore since 1986. All former British colonies have the law against gay sex. Last year, we tried to get that law (S377A) repealed but the christian rights won. In a way we won, too, because now everyone has to acknowledge there're gay people here. There're gay bars and saunas near the banking district. I think as late as 1980s, the operation of these were still a bit cloak and dagger. WRT living in fear, I guess it depends on the person. I know plenty of people who are very closeted. I also know plenty of people who are in-your-face out. I don't think the government censor is interested in my email. :-) Bigger fish to fry! My blog: http://leejean.livejournal.com/ The censor banned 100 websites, I think, mainly those to do with porn. I can get The Body, no problem. When I first came out, which coincided with Singapore opening up with bookshops bringing in gay books, I thought I'd have to move to San Francisco to meet other gay people. So, yes, I'd thought about moving to US. :-) Take care of yourself. Gwo Yinn _______________________________________________________

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